Wonder

-

My sweet girl. She is beautiful. I'm crazy about her and in awe of who she is. How did I get so blessed to have this wonder of a girl in my life? I try to tell her what she means to me, how she's impacting me. I don't remember many words of praise from my childhood. The ones I did receive were treasured. I want words of affirmation to be common to her and to all of her brothers. I want them to know where they stand with me, even on the days when I spend more time ranting and less time listening, holding, cuddling.

There was a time not so long ago when I hated who I was as a mother. I could hear myself speaking (yelling) and in my mind I would be saying "please shut your mouth, Angie, just please stop talking.". However, that is not the case any more. There are days when I still wonder, really, God, really, you thought I could be a Mom to 5? They are happening less and less. Most of the time I am loving it and who I am finally growing up to be.

Comments

  1. WendyFebruary 18, 2011 at 9:04 AM

    I betcha God says those first 5 sentences to you every day! You're a great Mom and an awesome woman.

    ReplyDelete
  2. ADMFebruary 18, 2011 at 9:55 AM

    Wendy, reading your words made me cry. Thank-you!! I started writing things down here just as a sort of journal. I realized after I became a follower of your blog that it would link to this!!! :) I guess I am more like you in the introverted way- I let Wayne do the talking. By the way, I'm enjoying your blog too.

    ReplyDelete

Post a Comment

Popular posts from this blog

April 18, 1984

-
Image
I awake in a bit of a fog, only slightly aware of the telephone ringing.  We got in late last night.  Long past our bedtime.  I can hear my father in the kitchen, his muffled conversation floating upstairs to my room.  It's just before 8.  We've slept in.  I'll have to rush to get ready for school this morning.  My father slowly climbs the stairs and I turn to see him enter my bedroom.  He is tired and carries a strange expression on his face.  He reaches my bedside and takes a seat.  He isn't looking at me, but out my bedroom window to the hillside and winding road.  When he faces me again tears have formed in his eyes.  He covers my hand with his and tells me my mother is gone.  His words get lost in a sudden release of grief.  I turn my head into my pillow, tears flowing.  I'm not completely certain of what he's said, I'm hoping I've misunderstood, but know...
Read more

Twenty Seven Years

-
Image
My first birthday Normally I see this day coming and anticipate it. Today it caught me by surprise. I love this picture of her, although I can't remember her this way. When I remember her last she looked so very different. I have a picture that was taken a few months before she passed away, but I like this one better. Funny, this picture was taken roughly 10 years before she died. I think I need to come back and post this later, it's still early in the day and I need to make it through before I land in a heap thinking about her..... I'm so thankful for my Mom. For the memories I have of her. I think my favourite memory is from when I was 7, 8 or 9, I'm not really sure. Jamie and I had returned to New Glasgow for a weekend to visit friends we had left behind when we moved. I don't know that I was ever away from her. I do remember vividly Saturday night, I was so lonesome for her. There was a snow storm raging outside and I was sure I would never get back home. Thing...
Read more

The long way around

-
Image
A little over 2 months ago I blogged about Elias. I told you about our trip to the IWK and how we discovered that what we were dealing with was not "scary". Fast forward to the end of that month and I'll fill you in on what's been happening since.... After his developmental assessment he was scheduled to meet with an occupational therapist because of some fine motor concerns. We met with her twice. On the last appointment she suggested he go see a physical therapist. She thought they would be able to give him some exercises to help him have more "control" over his wobbly legs and arms. We had that appointment at the end of June. I don't think we had been sitting in her exam room more than 20 minutes when she said these words- "I think I know what the problem is". Really? Had I heard her correctly?? She then went on to explain that Elias is hyper-flexible, which would explain why every doctor we've been to has said he has "low t...
Read more