Day 35 Being Held

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Yesterday I learned something I hadn't pieced together before about how God works.

Due to circumstances beyond my control, I was alone with the children and had to figure out how to get Elias to outpatients. He had a seizure. I called Kelly for clarity, to calm me down and talk to me. Once I had figured out how I was going to go with all of the kids, I headed for the hospital.

I was afraid, tired, sick, and alone. I sat closer to the driver's side window so Abby couldn't see me crying in the rear view mirror. I called out to Jesus, asking Him for peace and assurance. A song* I particularly love came on just then and I immediately was filled with calm. Be assured, I still was uncertain, a little afraid, and I was still crying, but I also had this profound sense of peace in the midst of it. Such a strange mix of emotions. It occurred to me then this is what it means to be held. God was holding me, so even though I was still feeling those other emotions, I could sense Him with me. Speaking peace to me. Assuring me that even though there was so much uncertainty I could be certain of one thing- He was holding me.

I love these things I'm being taught. Although the lessons are hard, I want to be awake to learn them. I want to be aware of Him in me, speaking to me, guiding me, loving me.

*

Comments

  1. WendyApril 21, 2011 at 9:46 AM

    I am so glad you felt you were not alone, as well as knew you were not alone. We are praying for you.

    ReplyDelete
  2. ADMApril 21, 2011 at 9:56 AM

    Thank you, Wendy. I know you are. Your husband was so kind to rush Wayne home like that....and to spend the night cuddling a pop machine in the Kentville hospital with Wayne. We appreciate it so much!

    ReplyDelete
  3. Sheila PalmerApril 21, 2011 at 1:32 PM

    Praying for you Angie - so glad you were able to feel the comfort of our Father's presence in the midst of it all! What a gift! Continuing to keep you & your family lifted up in prayer - Sending much Love xo

    ReplyDelete
  4. The Sutherland'sApril 21, 2011 at 3:19 PM

    What a beautiful video and song. Isn't it amazing that we can feel such comfort in times of trouble. What an amazing, loving father! Praying for Eli and some answers on Tuesday.

    ReplyDelete
  5. ADMApril 21, 2011 at 4:03 PM

    Thanks everyone!

    ReplyDelete
  6. AmandaApril 21, 2011 at 9:36 PM

    Isn't it great that your in-laws were able to watch the other kids while you went with Eli to the hospital. Hope everyone there is on the mend.

    ReplyDelete
  7. ADMApril 21, 2011 at 10:03 PM

    Yes, it's great they were able to do that, goes without saying!

    ReplyDelete

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